Well, not toxic, exactly... maybe just a little bit rank. But in a nice way. With a garnish.

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

social gathering

It was gone midnight and fuelled by a few pints of beer and some cheap draught cream sherry from the local off licence; my friends and I were on the search for mischief.

There was a skip on our street, now adorned with a comprehensive selection of dated Old Lady Furniture. Prime pickings of studenty prankness, we thought admiringly.

As students go, my mates and I were relatively well-behaved… we were practically respectable. Not too late to change, though.


The Hen and Chicken pub on the corner of our street was the local watering hole for couples… the kind of place where you would go if you’d managed to get a babysitter for the evening. Blokes put on their shiniest shirts and women donned high heels. Bouncers sneered at the doorway and expensive alcohol made ladies' cheeks glow.

A pint there was out of the question for us paupers… we went to the Star, where the clientele was generally much rougher and the beverages were affordable.

Perfect place to take the piss, then.
If we couldn’t afford to drink inside the Hen and Chicken, we’d drink outside instead. Well that was our reasoning, even if it was well after closing time.

There was a handy little mini roundabout just outside the Hen and Chicken. Nice views of the shops, plenty of warning in each direction of oncoming coppers. A gentle breeze, quite warm for the time of
year, not too much traffic… all it needed was a gathering of seats and some pintage..

We scrambled up into the skip, scavenging diligently between fits of laughter. I laughed so hard my face ached and my legs were at times strategically crossed.

Presently the mini roundabout was transformed into something that looked like your Auntie Betty’s living room… floral armchair and mismatched settee, standard lamp, little coffee table. Lovely.

We settled down, armed with cold cans from the fridge for a civilised but slightly pissed chat, grinning at passing taxis and toasting late night staggerers, before legging it like crazy when someone finally called the police…….


  • At January 10, 2006 12:28 pm, Blogger Sniffy said…

    That's a very interesting insight into your past. When and where did this occur?

    Personally, during my drinking days, I used to frequent the local park bench with a bottle of blue label thunderbird. Nobody ever bothered me if I shouted at the pigeons enough.

  • At January 10, 2006 12:33 pm, Blogger funny thing said…

    Early ninties, Bristol.

    Obviously I'm an upstanding member of the community now.
    That is, I mostly am able to stand upright without the aid of a floral armchair, but there has been the odd exception.

    Don't tell my boss...

    Thunderbird is rank. Cheap though; full of essential student goodness.

  • At January 10, 2006 3:17 pm, Blogger surly girl said…

    a genius story. i wish i'd thought of that.

  • At January 10, 2006 3:19 pm, Blogger surly girl said…

    christ, could my comments be any duller today?

  • At January 10, 2006 3:26 pm, Blogger funny thing said…

    SG, yes they could. You could have commented on the weather.

    It's a true story, BTW. Obviously I exaggerated the bit about the alcohol, I've never been known to allow anything stonger than Ovaltine to pass my lips, or perhaps a Red Grape Shloer if I'm feeling fruity...

  • At January 10, 2006 3:56 pm, Blogger Kyahgirl said…

    you do know how to have fun, don't you? sounds like a good time.

  • At January 10, 2006 4:33 pm, Blogger Mdx said…

    High of 60 today.

  • At January 10, 2006 4:43 pm, Blogger surly girl said…

    i meant i wished i'd thought of doing it, not that i wished i'd made it up like i thought you had.

    dark, isn't it?

  • At January 10, 2006 5:13 pm, Blogger funny thing said…

    Aye. Bit parky. Did you have rain? We did.

  • At January 10, 2006 6:43 pm, Blogger S.I.D. said…

    Tsk, tsk,

    How occasional table nor cucumber sandwiches in sight.

  • At January 10, 2006 6:58 pm, Blogger Sniffy said…

    Thunderbird is fuckin' delish! Well, it used to be compared to the 60p a pint bitter down at the Union. Bristol eh? A lot of the most miserable (but also most brilliant) music comes out of Bristol.

    Can't you turn off word verification? It's so tiresome.

  • At January 10, 2006 7:18 pm, Blogger funny thing said…

    Okay, it's off on a trial run. I was just getting sick of all the spam ads.
    It goes back on if I get inundated tho...

    Bristol. *sigh* Those were the days.
    I can't think of a single good band though, you might need to help me out there!

    I used to go to loads of gigs for a crusty/folky/cajun band called K-Passa and another spoof band called Doreen Doreen.

    That's about all I can remember...

  • At January 10, 2006 9:43 pm, Blogger garfer said…

    I lived in Bristol in the early 90's but I don't recognise those pubs.

    I hope you aren't making this up (not that you would).

    Howling gale and pissing down with rain here.

  • At January 10, 2006 10:08 pm, Blogger Sniffy said…

    Oh come on FT! Massive Attack, Portishead, Kosheen, Morcheeba...

  • At January 10, 2006 10:17 pm, Blogger funny thing said…

    The Hen and Chicken was in Southville and The Star was in Bedminster, both on North Road.

    Which part of bristol, garf?

    T - yeah, you're right. Chilled stuff. I did once bump into all of The Levellers in a juggling shop in Bath once, as Surly Girl will testify. Go on, ask her... she knows all about it.

    kind of...

  • At January 10, 2006 10:17 pm, Blogger Sniffy said…

    It's been wet and windy here today too, but the rain has stopped and the wind subsided this evening.

    Always happy to provide up to the minute weather information.

  • At January 10, 2006 10:18 pm, Blogger funny thing said…

    It's dark here, I can't see the weather.

  • At January 10, 2006 10:26 pm, Blogger garfer said…

    Redland and Montpelier.

  • At January 10, 2006 10:32 pm, Blogger funny thing said…


    I was in art-studentland.

    Ever go to the Bierkeller or Fleece and Firkin? I once saw PJ Harvey play at the Fleece. She was great. I was the pissed one at the back.

  • At January 10, 2006 10:48 pm, Blogger garfer said…

    Yeah, been to both. Not that I can remember much.

    P J is a west country dwelling, pumpkin soup making goddess.

  • At January 10, 2006 11:49 pm, Anonymous imp said…

    Has this blog really resorted to discussing the weather. It's very boring even when tongue in cheek.

    However it's raineD here all day!

    FT you used to be so so naughty... You kept that one quiet but sounds great fun though.

    I must admit I can just imagine you sitting in the middle of a roundabout, on a setee, beer in hand and telling everyone pieces of useless information!!

    I'm sure we could have just as much fun in the 2000s in Cardiff! Probably need to drink more though.
    Obviously you'll be on the Ovaltine and leaving the hard stuff to me.


  • At January 11, 2006 12:03 am, Blogger funny thing said…

    I resent the useless information bit! All my conversation is interesting, up-to-date and completely relevant. I never, ever ever talk bollox... know me too well :)

    (Hurray for PJ!)

  • At January 11, 2006 8:57 am, Blogger Sniffy said…

    Very windy in Manc overnight (kept waking me up), still strong winds today.

    Animals in road on M56 this morning.


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